When Your Spouse is Not an HSP
- Caprice
- Sep 15, 2016
- 2 min read

This seems like the perfect topic for this day, my 15th wedding anniversary. Happy anniversary honey!
If you've read my other blog posts you'll know that my spouse is not an HSP and most definitely not an introvert. Overall, he intuitively just accepted me as he is a compassionate person and really good with animals. I think anyone who is really gentle and not controlling with animals has a good chance of being able to handle the peculiarities of an HSP.
The one area we struggled with was around timing when to arrive at events with a definite start time. His ideal would be to arrive 10 - 15 minutes early. This is the opposite of mine, which is to leave skid marks on the pavement as I slide in 30 seconds before "start time". For a long time there was this passive aggressive tug of rope game going on between us about what time to arrive at events. Finally we had a heart to heart about it and we realized that we had opposite needs. His extroverted side needed to get there early to connect with people. My introverted HSP side needed to have as much quiet as possible and avoid meaningless chit chat with people in whom I'm just not that invested. We finally compromised and now he either goes in his own car earlier or we go together and I sit in the car until it's time to go in.
Dr. Elaine Aron is producing a second film on the topic called "Sensitive and In Love". I haven't can't wait to see it! I'm guessing it will be very helpful for mixed couples (HSP/Non-HSP). One friend of mine had her husband read the book "The Very Sensitive Person", by Dr. Aron. I do my best to own my HSP and not just make my husband do everything my way. So that means sometimes I go to noisy concerts with him and I just take very good care of myself before and after. Other times we do things that are more my style.
How have you and your partner/spouse/lover/whatever worked it out?
Blessings!
Caprice
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